Bats, Cats & Pointy Hats
EmJay, 26. My blog contains adult themes. Mad Scientist, homebrew witch. Actual Hooded Figure. My computer's name is Cheryl. Cheryl is dead. They pronouns.

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vaspider:

“average president has 2 felony charges” factoid actualy just statistical error. average president has 0 felony charges. Felonies Don, who lives in a state of disgrace (Florida) & has 92 felony charges, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

(via videntefernandez)


halberdierminister:

oglegoggle:

halberdierminister:

deadpansasser:

halberdierminister:

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Look at this cool new t-shirt I made for fans of Abraham Lincoln! I made it on my own time, with my own resources, and without any affiliation to existing public or private institutions concerned with history, education, hospitality, culture or retail. You can find it at my new Threadless shop or directly at bit.ly/imissabe

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(via jetpack-island)


sioltach:

sioltach:

I think if you showed upper paleolithic humans some dog pajamas they’d go crazy for it

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This would be the talk of the settlement they would never get over it

(via jetpack-island)


scarlettohairdye:

PSA to printed zine makers

As a 37 year old who’s been running a sole proprietorship for the last 10+ years, I just want everyone who is planning to run a fandom project that involves accepting money for printing & shipping costs to know that you’re actually running a small business and you need to plan for taxes. It doesn’t matter if you don’t make any profit: that is business income and the IRS will see it as such if you get audited.

If you only take enough money in to cover the cost of printing & shipping then you can write that off as a business expense and probably not pay taxes on it, But in order for that to fly you actually have to do business accounting, especially if you’re doing it at scale. Like, you can probably skate by without reporting a $500 project; I absolutely would not fucking risk it with a $5000 project.

Back when I was producing shows there were years when I was where I made $20k in ticket sales only to turn around and immediately pay $18k to my performers. I only made $2k for myself, but I had to report the entire $20k, because it was ALL INCOME. (I only paid taxes on the $2000, because that’s how writing off expenses works!)

Yeah this is boring grownup shit and I’m getting my boring grownup fingers all over your fun fandom, but boring grownups doing boring grownup things are the reason fandom spaces exist at all (paying for servers is deeply boring), and I’m way more fun than an audit

(via sabertoothwalrus)


life stuff

iconuk01:

charlesoberonn:

ardinwriter:

charlesoberonn:

charlesoberonn:

exponentiallygayrobot:

charlesoberonn:

charlesoberonn:

Middle-aged magical girl.

She’s been defending the Earth since the early 90s and she’s very tired.

My name is Tominaga Haruka. I was chosen by a magical talking animal, and for the last 29 years I’ve been Earth’s one and only… Wonder-Sparkle Princess.

she’s been fighting the same villains for three decades and they are also tired of it. Most of them aren’t giving it their all.
Half of them are in a groupchat they’ve added her to where they schedule their evil plans to make sure they don’t interfere with each other, or more importantly, with *her*

Xalkrax the space demon from outer space decided to attack the city when she was taking her vacation time once, and now he’s dead, because even the power of friendship and redemption can’t save you if you interrupt her rare vacations

Demon Queen Eluria: Gonna fill the city people’s hearts with hatred on thursday to cause mayhem and discord.

Wonder-Sparkle Princess: Can’t, got a PTA meeting.

Demon Queen Eluria: Friday?

Wonder-Sparkle Princess: A birthday party.

Demon Queen Eluria: Damn. How about I fill just the mayor’s heart with hatred then?

Wonder-Sparkle Princess: That’d be redundant, lol. Maybe fill his heart with a desire to fix the fucking potholes?!

Demon Queen Eluria: LMFAO love you, bitch. Stay strong.

Wonder-Sparkle Princess: You too, gurl. How’s the husband? Still dead?

Demon Queen Eluria: Yep. Thanks for that, btw.

Wonder-Sparkle Princess: Don’t mess with my time off :p

Why are people tagging this ’#wonder sparkle princess’ like that’s a thing and not a name I made up exclusively for this post?

Congratulations on inventing a new tumblr deity!!

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She isn’t 29 years old. She’s been a magical girl for 29 years. If she started at 14 (typical magical girl protagonist age) then she’d be 43.

She detests having to do the transformation spin because her ankles can’t take all that spinning around on the spot any more, and the last time she tried to lift her leg higher than her shoulder she nearly tore a ligament.

(via jetpack-island)


stories like the mom from magical girl ore

madseance:

madseance:

“it’s not queer fiction unless the queerness is explicitly declared in the text according to currently accepted terminology and in a way that meets the approval of the entire audience” I mean follow your heart I guess but I trust myself as a queer person to recognise queer themes

“but doesn’t this risk giving the author undue credit for queer representation” I do not care about the author

(via catnippackets)


montymollusk:

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please look at this picture junji ito drew of his moms crusty white dog

(via canis-la-trans)


bakedbananners:

I love when dogs and cats just let you pat the shit out of them and they enjoy it so much. Like yeah dude real quick I just need to play you like a bongo and they’re like god yes I’ve been waiting for someone to play me like a bongo

(via thingsstingshouldsing)


goofballproximitysurveyor:

scissorsisters:

I love having interests that I would never ever recommend to any of my friends ever

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(via lagomort)


cryptotheism:

orcboxer:

lokaror:

So many dipshits always trying to summon angels or devils. Focus on summoning the gnomish folk. Get real.

How do I summon gnomes

Conjuring gnomes wikihow

Gnomes summon ritual online free

First European manuscript to reference gnomes as summonable magical creatures is Ex Libro de Nymphis, Sylvanis, Pygmaeis, Salamandris et Gigantibus by Swiss Lay-theologian Philippus Aureolus Theophrastus Bombastus von Hohenheim.

Your search for Gnome-lore begins here, friend.